Before we visit Denial let me set the record straight. I’m doing this because I want you to know me, trust me and have complete faith in me. I want to be your friend in every sense of the word. It is time I reveal my true station in life and I hope you will understand and stay with me. I was an alcoholic and substance abuser for ten long years of my life. I lived in a place that I call the Gray World, a place for the outcasts from the Real World. I won’t go into my story but I found a reason to change and move back into the Real World. I now live a happy, successful, active and productive life and I have dedicated the rest of my life to help others do the same.
Some of the content that you’ll find in this book was originally directed to the abuser. However as I grew in knowledge and wisdom I found that the techniques that I use in this book (They same techniques that saved my life and has since saved hundreds of lives) will work in any situation or circumstance. Therefore I have broadened my dedication to help anyone and everyone with a true desire to change their way of life for the better things in life. Now if you are still with me let’s continue.
Denial is used as a block out tool to avoid self hurt and hurting those that we care about. It keeps people from facing the issue and finding solutions to take positive action when their overall happiness is at stake. People keep to themselves whiling in emotional denial not facing negative life situations and bitter relationships that keep them imprisoned in life’s circumstances. They are aware that the situation is not good, but not bad enough to face the problem and take positive action. Facing the brutal facts is important to eliminating unhappiness. To face the truth would mean acknowledging the fact that there is an emotional price to pay when you don’t find the solution to solve the problem. The person in denial will stay in denial until they face the cause of denial and nip it in the bud. Every day you don’t take action the problem will get worse. At worst it hurts, at best it keeps everything in an indeterminate state.
This isn’t a very high price when you’re living form moment to moment. However each fleeting moment can turn into a day and each day can turn into a week and before you know it time becomes a slow dying death for yourself and others. Your chance for happiness will be wasted away struggling to find a solution but while still in denial.
To find true happiness there has to be a means to deal with and eliminate unhappiness in our real life situations. Eliminating unhappiness means finding a way to take positive action. It is only by facing the real issues, changing your negative way of thinking to positive thought, eliminating unhappiness and replacing it with happiness that you’ll have a chance to build a new and better life. Facing the brutal facts is much more than putting on a happy face and acting happy, you have to overhaul your attitude and change your way of thinking.
Denial is an unconscious defense mechanism which is necessary for survival. None of us can survive without a certain amount of denial to keep us in balance. However denial in people who have a traumatic problem is taken to an extreme and becomes unhealthy in that it becomes an obstacle to their recovery. People have a tendency to go into denial when they need help. One reason for denial is that people generally do not like to feel helpless and out-of-control.
Denial in addiction is primarily difficult because the problem of the substance abuse plus denial and driving can be fatal for the abuser and others. In addition, some of the health risks associated with denial includes heart disease, lung and liver disease, overdosing and brain damage. But, no matter what the cause is of the denial, the important part is that the addict confronts the defense mechanism head on... Many times, for many reasons, the person suffering from denial will start to face their denial because their lives truly have become unmanageable.
I have researched many so called miracle and magical treatment programs to insure my recovery and success. I have found that most all of them are good to a point, unfortunately, at least to my knowledge none that I researched offered total recovery. It took a dedicated effort and perseverance, on my part, to find the right solutions. In other words, it takes pure guts and determination as well as the power of positive thinking and a complete change of mental behavior to find success in any endeavor.